Lesson Learned

You know how new mothers are always given advice to set aside "me time" for themselves throughout the day so they won't become burnt out on parenthood too quickly ("You'll be a better mommy if you take care of yourself, too!")? Obviously, the same is true in the professional world as well. For all intents and purposes, I'm a full-time mother of 101 rambunctious, wild, uniquely talented, sometimes pessimistic and downtrodden, often loud, energetic, enthusiastic, and nearly always unpredictable teenagers...and let me tell you, this mama has been TIRED.

The weeks leading up to Spring break were a tangled mess of chaos, exhaustion, and bad tempers. Much like the entire month of November leading up to Thanksgiving break, I found myself unable to cope with the day-to-day distractions, not to mention the subsequent breakdowns (on my part as well as the kids'). One wrong word or dirty look, one unnecessary or irrelevant question, one little interruption usually made me lose it. In short, I was an absolute miserable person to be around.

I'm learning--albeit slowly--how to handle myself when I'm in that stressed out, inconsolable state. True, kids sometimes make choices that don't exactly help their academic future, but most of my blow-ups aren't so much their fault but are definitely an overreaction on my part. So here's what I've learned: 1. Be honest. I often find myself saying things like, "I'm making a huge effort to not get carried away right now, but I'm getting extremely frustrated because..." Sounds tacky, yes, but I've it let's me call them out on inappropriate behavior while keeping my own attitude in check. Plus, I've noticed that most of my kids are appreciative, if not a little amused, when I'm upfront about the fact that I'm about to lose it and need their cooperation.
 2. Apologize as often as necessary. Yeah, I'm the teacher, I'm the adult, I'm the authority in the classroom, blah blah blah. But when I'm wrong, I'm wrong. Most of my apologies are because I shot back at a kid with some snarky or sarcastic comment that just wasn't necessary. Or I took out my frustration from one kid/class on another and was acting a little crazy. Whatever it may be, it's a humbling experience to stand in front of 27 judgmental teenagers and ask forgiveness, but it goes a long way in maintaining whatever trust has been built  between you and them throughout the year. And finally, 3. PRAY. Pray for grace for yourself and your kids. Pray for good attitudes and vulnerability in the learning process. Pray that your classroom would be a place of refuge and joy for those students who need an escape.  Pray for your own heart to be open to what they can teach you.